On today’s episode of The Healing Network Live, Wendy Giancola, author of Transforming Your Story and Director of the Capitol Hill Pregnancy Center, shares her journey to healing and transformation after abortion.
Her story
Wendy and her boyfriend were the first in their families to go to college. Wide-eyed and optimistic, they were both set on making a name for themselves. But when Wendy found herself pregnant her freshman year of college at the age of 19, she was shocked and devastated. Wendy remembers being overcome with fear. She feared judgment—judgment within her family and within society. She feared her abilities—Can I do this? I don’t know what I’m doing. There is no way I would be a good mom. She also feared she would be incapable of carrying a child without injury to herself, given her congenital heart defect. Wendy remembers the pressure of being expected to continue on the path of higher education. She felt trapped. Unfortunately, abortion felt like her only option.
Wendy’s true healing after abortion didn’t take place until 15 years later. Although she and her boyfriend stayed together, the relationship was dysfunctional for quite some time. Neither pursued healing. Wendy shares that she crashed outwardly while he crashed inwardly. Wendy recounts a series of behavioral changes that are quite common after an abortion experience. She became disconnected. She became angry and full of rage. She unknowingly blamed her boyfriend. She became promiscuous outside of the relationship. She began drinking a lot. She chased success. All of these behaviors spiraled out of control until her relationship with her boyfriend, turned husband, hit rock bottom. To fix their dysfunctional relationship, her husband suggested church. Wendy reluctantly obliged, attending but not listening, on numerous occasions. It wasn’t until the sermon on the adulterous woman that her heart finally softened, and she began to listen. Click here to view a similar message that shows how Jesus meets broken women where they are.
Her Road to Healing
Wendy remembers the pivotal moment in her healing. When her church announced they would be discussing abortion, Wendy immediately felt angry. She immediately felt judged. Sitting in the pew, she felt intense feelings of fear, shame, and condemnation. Nowhere in that announcement did the church mention healing, so instantly, her mind went to the impending judgment that would surely follow. Wendy, with her unaddressed anger rising to the surface, confronted the woman who would be speaking on the topic. When the woman asked Wendy why this topic was so hard for her, it was as if a “release valve” was initiated. Wendy released it all, sharing her abortion experience in its entirety. And the woman, in return, introduced her to healing after abortion through Linda Cochrane’s Forgiven and Free.Her Road to Healing
Wendy remembers the pivotal moment in her healing. When her church announced they would be discussing abortion, Wendy immediately felt angry. She immediately felt judged. Sitting in the pew, she felt intense feelings of fear, shame, and condemnation. Nowhere in that announcement did the church mention healing, so instantly, her mind went to the impending judgment that would surely follow. Wendy, with her unaddressed anger rising to the surface, confronted the woman who would be speaking on the topic. When the woman asked Wendy why this topic was so hard for her, it was as if a “release valve” was initiated. Wendy released it all, sharing her abortion experience in its entirety. And the woman, in return, introduced her to healing after abortion through Linda Cochrane’s Forgiven and Free.
Her Transformation
After experiencing a layer of healing, the Director of the Capitol Hill Pregnancy Center approached Wendy about volunteering. By helping others and walking through healing with them, Wendy could go deeper in her own healing. She later transitioned to a staff member, responsible for heading up the pregnancy loss ministry. It was here that through her research to find a curriculum that would best fit her center’s demographic that she learned of her calling to create a curriculum herself. Though she gave God some push back, Wendy relented when she found herself stuck at home after a car accident that had resulted in a broken pelvis. Because the use of stories had been instrumental in her healing, Wendy’s book, Transforming Your Story, centers around stories. Selected Bible stories and personal stories intersect to help readers and participants to transform their own abortion experiences. Each chapter includes powerful activities for reflection. These activities allow participants to contextualize the lessons learned from the stories and apply them to their healing journey. The Transforming Your Story curriculum, while designed for groups, has proven to be very beneficial in one-on-one settings. Wendy closes out today’s episode with beautiful encouragement for those who have been impacted by abortion–with access to outstanding healing programs via virtual groups, don’t stay stuck. Grow and heal.
If you or someone you know is struggling after abortion, you are not alone. Contact us today.
Eager for More?
We hope you’ll join us for more groundbreaking conversations on abortion and abortion healing at Support After Abortion’s Healing Network Virtual Conference. Access is from October – December 2020.
Wendy Giancola is a featured presenter. Don’t miss your chance to hear her talk on Why You Need to Keep Going.